If You Are Feeling Overwhelmed, Focus on These 3 Things
Overwhelm creates a negative feedback loop, but you can break out of it!
Hi friend,
Overwhelm is a real thing at the moment.
Many of the people I know are struggling with low energy, a lack of motivation, minor health issues (such as getting one cold after the other), job insecurity or economic concerns. Some are dealing with major health issues, or a loved one who got a scary health diagnosis.
Add to that what’s currently going on in the collective, politics, the rate of change with AI and technology—and it’s a wonder we are still as well-adjusted as we are. (I mean that sincerely. We all deserve a pat on the back.)
If you are like many of the people I talk to, you’re exhausted! You want to enjoy life… but right now, it probably feels more like running around in circles and constantly putting out fires.
All you want is to take a vacation. That, and to save the world.
Let’s dive deeper into this sense of overwhelm, and what to do about it.
(This article describes my current thoughts on productivity and procrastination. It’s not intended to be mental health advice. Please reach out to a mental health professional if you are struggling with your mental health. ❤️)
What causes/increases overwhelm?
In my view, the current collective sense of overwhelm is caused by an incredibly fast pace of change. Things are changing faster than we can comfortably handle, and often, they don’t change in a direction we prefer. Things that used to be certain no longer are, and that creates this pervasive feeling of insecurity and overwhelm.
While processing all these shifts could be its own full-time job, we still have to live our lives. Even with all that’s going on collectively, there’s still stuff we have to do—perhaps even more than before.
And that’s when things get from challenging to even more challenging.
If you are currently feeling overwhelmed, you are likely experiencing a negative feedback loop between procrastination and overwhelm.
Overwhelm turns us into a deer in the headlight: we freeze, instead of taking the right action. That’s why overwhelm leads to procrastination.
That procrastination, in turn, increases the sense of overwhelm:
To break this negative feedback loop, it's important to decrease your sense of overwhelm (I know, easier said than done!).
How can you decrease overwhelm?
The easiest way to decrease overwhelm is to
focus on the things you can control or at least influence, and
get clear on your priorities.
1. Focusing on what you can control or influence
The first step helps you reclaim your energy from things outside your control.
To do this, we use the "Three Circles of Concern" framework that got popularized by bestselling author Stephen Covey. It divides the things we care about into three concentric circles, based on the level of influence we have on them.
Circle of Concern (outer circle): This includes all the things we care about but have no direct control over, for instance politics, the economy, and the weather. We can’t change these things directly, so focusing too much here can lead to stress and helplessness.
Circle of Influence (middle circle): This circle contains things we can’t control outright but can influence through our actions or decisions. It includes relationships, workplace dynamics, and other areas where how we show up can make a difference.
Circle of Control (inner circle): The innermost circle represents things we have direct control over, such as our attitudes, responses, choices, and behaviors.
To put this into practice, grab a piece of paper, and draw 3 circles. Then, think about the things you are preoccupied with. Decide which category they fall into:
Are the things you can control? For instance, whether you meditate 5 minutes a day is typically something you can control.
Are they things you can influence? For instance, your mood might be something you can influence (but not control).
Or are they things you are concerned about that you can neither control nor influence? For instance, politics typically falls into this category.
When you are done with this, commit to spending more time focusing on the two smaller circles (where you have control or at least influence).
2. Prioritize the things you care about
The second step helps you sort all your tasks according to your priorities.
Here’s why this matters: without priorities, everything feels important, which makes it hard to start and complete any of the tasks on one's to-do list.
The difference between a priority and everything else you could do is comparable to triage in case of an accident: dealing with injured people can be very stressful. That's why everyone has to focus on the most important things.
Medical personnel will make sure that an injured person stays alive (priority), but they probably won't worry too much about cosmetic damage to their patient’s nose (not a priority).
The same principle holds true in everyday life. Not all tasks you think you should do are created equally: some can make a huge positive difference in your life (priorities) while many others won’t move the needle much (to-dos).
The problem is that when you are overwhelmed, you are in a state of stress, and that makes it harder to determine what category tasks fall into.
That’s why it’s important to either
get into a less stressed state prior to setting priorities, for instance, through meditation, journaling, etc. (you can try out this meditation I recorded), or
get help from someone who can help you see things clearly.
What happens when you don’t address overwhelm?
If you don’t deal with the underlying causes of your overwhelm, here's what will likely happen:
Your sense of overwhelm will keep on getting worse. As more tasks pile up, you will try to do more, which gets you more stressed, which makes it harder to focus.
You will likely stay in this downward spiral until you
get competent help, or
learn to address the underlying causes on your own, or
something changes in your external circumstances.
If your sense of overwhelm is caused by a lack of priorities, even external changes might completely erase the problem. Because we live in a time when almost everyone has too many things they could do, learning to prioritize is a crucial life skill for the 21st century.
What do you need to focus on to become more productive and less overwhelmed?
To get out of the negative feedback loop between overwhelm and procrastination, it’s important to focus on these 3 things:
You need to learn how to differentiate between priorities and to-dos, and then follow through on completing your priorities.
You also need to set appropriate boundaries with other people so you can stay focused on your goals.
Lastly, having too much to do has likely left you tired and drained, so you also need to learn how to rest and recover.
Once you address these underlying causes, you can start to reduce your pile of undone tasks, and in the process create more time and energy for what really matter to you in all areas of life.
Instead of just putting our fires, you can start to work on things you find meaningful—your ability to prioritize will help you with that.
In other words, your life can get a lot better!
How to put this into action
If you desire personal support in moving from overwhelm to clarity, know that I'm here to guide you.
My approach helps you to:
align with your most meaningful priorities,
implement powerful boundaries,
embrace the art of true rest, and
cultivate a life that feels joyful and purposeful, far beyond conventional productivity metrics.
Discover how we can work together to bring these transformations into your life.
P.S.: Before (overwhelmed) and after (on-top-of-things)
When people are overwhelmed, it’s hard to take action. It’s like being a deer in the headlights, frozen in inaction:
When you are resourced, it’s much easier to take the necessary actions — like this deer who is clearly on top-of-things:
Thank you for this excellent advice.